Pick up that Poo... Or ELSE!

First, some quick reading homework for ya...

READ ME

If you don't have the time (and I know most of you don't), here is the gist:

How POO-fect is THIS?!?

There is now simple DNA testing for dog poo, to identify the poo-er. In the Reuters story at the link, in Conway, MA an apartment manager fed up with steaming piles left about her charge decided to enlist newly mass produced DNA technology called "PooPrints," developed by BioPet Vet Labs of Knoxville, Tennessee. 

How does it work? They basically require every new pet that moves in to the property to provide a cheek swab (MOUTH cheek...) so their doggy DNA is extracted and entered into the system. As time passes, and bombs are dropped about the property and left unattended, the property manager mails a "gumball sized amount" of the poo in question to the testing facility (and that is legal with the USPS HOW?!? Again, ew.) and the guilty pooch (rather, their naughty person) is identified. Then the owner is hit with a pretty hefty fine--$1000 in some referenced cases. And the accuracy rate is listed at 99.9%, so good luck explaining that one away when Geraldo or Maury reveal the DNA results... "You, Scruffy, ARE the father... of the brown babies in question..." <dog howls>

Wait - why, again? It seems that some property managers are ready and willing to take CSI-style investigation into their own hands. But I wonder, will it one day become illegal to snatch up dog poo without the express written consent of the owner? Will this stand up and be admissible evidence? Will the testing, sampling and processing (ew...) procedures become inadmissible because they were not handled by experts in the field? The imagination just runs WILD on this topic and the hours of due process (or shall I say... DOO POO-cess) it one day might command.

Bottom line is that DNA testing, even for what seem like such trivial things as dog droppings left behind, is rapidly finding its way into the hands of common folks like you and me. I can only imagine how this mainstreaming could begin to translate into widespread "who-dunnit" style CSI <insert your town here>-meets Angela Lansbury DIY crime investigations all over the place. No longer a highly technical futuristic tool for the researcher or investigator with years of training and education under their belts to wield, this seems to be the edge of a pretty step cliff that will level the playing field so to speak for using science to proving sourcing and more... and prove it beyond a shad-DOO of a doubt....! Sorry. Could not resist.

All in all, it seems kinda cool, but also makes me want to take my recycling home with me when I finish off a Diet Coke. Leave no trace! ...Or else!